Q's Baptism

Our little Q was baptized this weekend, on the 10th anniversary of the terrorist attacks on our nation.  Kind of a renewal of sorts, a way to see the positive in every day life.

Q in her Baptismal bonnet from her Godparents: Uncle G and Aunt S

I love how the kids are so intently watching her.

This is the first baby I've had that did not scream and cry bloody murder during the baptism.  Instead, she actually fell asleep.  She let out a little startled cry when the priest initially anointed her with holy water, but that was it.  She truly is a little gem.

Being baptized is exhausting

Our 1st attempt at a family photo all dressed up

Q and Grammy

Q with Grandma, after a little wardrobe change

Big brother, L

Big sister, J

Big sissy, C

My family

P's boo boo

My husband has found a new passion - obstacle course runs aka mud runs.  It started with the Warrior Dash when I was either 8 or 9 months pregnant.  Q is 11 weeks now and he has now participated in 3 of these events.  This last one though, the Spartan Race, will be his last for quite a while since he unfortunately got a boo boo mid-run.  The kids and I had been waiting for him to come through the finish line when I mentioned to a woman next to me that I was really surprised it was taking him so long to finish.  Her response?  Of course, a heart-warming "I hope he's not laying out there hurt and no one notices him."  Ugh! I couldn't help but get a pit in my stomach.  I have to admit, the thought had crossed my mind earlier, but I just brushed it away.

Not even two minutes later, I heard my phone ring.  "Is this Karen Walker?" said a very stern voice.

"Yes"

"You need to come to the medical tent right now. I have Paul Walker here."

"Uh...where's the medical tent," I asked with my voice shaking.

When the kids and I finally made it across the venue, I was shocked to find an empty tent.  Then, the entourage came out of the connected building.  "Karen Walker.  Right this way!"  They wisked me up the ramp, carrying the stroller, each man with a kid.  I can't even tell you all the thoughts that went through my mind.  I mean, P is in great shape, but I couldn't help but think that perhaps he had a heart attack.  Maybe he fell on or off an obstacle and was impaled by something.  The men said they would watch my kids for me, while I went into the ambulance to check on P.  I seriously thought he was dying.  When I saw him, all strapped to the table, oxygen mask on, my heart broke for him.  Then, I saw his elbow.  It looked like it wasn't even there, like perhaps it had been shattered.  They started asking me questions (age, allergies, ssn, etc...) while they were awaiting to learn to which hospital they would be taking him.  In the end, since he was feeling light headed and had dislocated his elbow, they were told they needed to take him to the nearest trauma center...40 minutes away.

Poor P.  They gave him some pain meds, but not enough to control his pain.  While driving behind the ambulance, I saw the EMT's get up.  Apparently, they were just switching seats, but I couldn't help but think that maybe he went into shock, or passed out, or had that heart attack that I was worried about earlier.

Meanwhile, in the back of the van, L and J were in tears, though J seemed to stop crying when I told them that I had called grandma and she was going to drive the hour and a half to come get them.  C, on the other hand, was absolutely hysterical. She was saying things like, "My daddy in that trunk.  Him have a boo boo.  I gonna kiss it.  Hims dead.  Why my daddy in the trunk that truck?"  She is too hilarious!

Well, to make a long story short, P was in tons of pain, they had to knock him out to put his elbow back in the socket.  Do you think they cleaned the mud off his arm though?  No, of course not.  Instead, they splinted his arm and sent us on our way.  All of this happened on a Saturday.  They told us that it would be 6-8 weeks in a splint, followed by months of physical therapy.

Day 3 - Monday

Day 4 - today

On Monday, P's splint was taken off and he was given a much better prognosis.  In two weeks, he will begin seeing an occupational therapist.




You know, its strange.  You think that your family is healthy.  You never think you have to worry about someone "dying".  Already, I've lost a young and healthy brother.  Saturday, I thought I had almost lost my husband.  Strange how these things put your life into perspective.

Stay safe and healthy all!

Being run rag-ged

Okay, so I'm not going to exaggerate and claim that I LOVE my life, that there is nothing I would change.  Let's be honest, there are things in everyone's lives that they would change: improving a relationship, more sleep, more sex, more money, less work, etc..  Today, let's just say, I wanted to change my schedule.  I never really realized how stay-at-home mom's could be so tired or get so little done until today.  I anticipated my day to look a little something like this:
7am - wake everyone up
8am - P takes L to school while I feed all 3 girls
8:30 am - Drop J off at school
9:30 am - Breakfast with some girlfriends
12 pm - Pick J up
3 pm - Pick L up
3:30 pm - Q's doctor's appointment
5 pm - Kung Fu for L

Add a 10:45 doctor's appointment for P into the mix and a 7 pm visit from my mother for editing help for her paper, and I was BEAT.  Thank goodness P was feeling better and was able to make L's lunch since I fell asleep on the couch!

I have a feeling that days like this probably won't end until 2029!  Eeek!  Tired, but I really did love being there for my family.

Random thoughts I want to share/record

After an absolutely exhaustive 2 days, I thought it would be important to sit down and record the happenings for future enjoyment purposes and to just get some things off my chest.

1. L had his first day of kindergarten yesterday.  The 5 of us walked him into his classroom and let's just say that he was thrilled.  I could sense that he was a little apprehensive, but all in all, he was happy to be starting school.  When I picked him up, he said that he had an amazing day, but that I packed too much food for him.  Apparently, he doesn't have enough time to eat all of it.  Well, if that was the worst part, I'm a-okay with that :)  He also made a new friend, Arthur.  So happy my big boy loves school.  He even asked to draw his teacher a picture to say that he likes her, he wrote "I lik Ms Mlr"  Too cute!

2. J had her first day of pre-k today, a much anticipated day, filled with tons of apprehension of all of our parts.  Since having pulled her from her original preschool because I was angry/upset with the CEO, we ended up at a new school based on recommendations from 2 friends.  Very briefly, I was torn between what has been promised to be a more academic program with dirty carpets and a familiar program with all of her friends.  Ugh!  Though the CEO and my emotional state that day seemed to force my hand, I ultimately chose to go with a different program.  I mean, I figured that she'll have to meet new friends in kindergarten anyway, and at least 2 of these kids could be in her kindergarten class, so maybe its not such a horrible idea.  Well, we arrived at school, very excited, but when I look back at the pictures I took, I can get a sense of J's apprehension.  In the end, she had a great day: visit from the bookmobile, her new friend Kiara brought cupcakes to celebrate her birthday, and she has a mailbox at school into which she puts her papers.

3. So, I can totally see how some stay-at-home moms are super thin and others are super not.  For example, yesterday, I arrived home from the new morning routine (school, gym) a bit before noon and I was STARVED.  Immediately, I go into the kitchen and pull out food for lunch.  As I begin to prepare lunch, Q has a blowout.  While changing her diaper and clothes, the phone rings.  After taking that brief call, I turn my attention back to C and J's lunch when the phone rang again. Three sentences into the call, there's a knock at the door.  So, I take my diapered only baby to the door and while I'm chatting, C is in the kitchen making her own food, she's 2 mind you, and J is in the bathroom putting a bandaid on each of 10 fingers.  "Don't worry mom, I'm not wasting them.  See I threw most of them in the garbage."  Fantastic!  Then, I set the baby back down to actually make lunch when she starts to throw a fit because come on, why does everyone but her get to eat?! Oh, let's not forget that I have yet to shower at this point.  By the time I got everyone fed and I grabbed a quick shower, it was time to go pick the boys up from school.  Oh yeah!
Okay then, so how do they end up super "not" skinny?  Well, let's just say that after the kids went to bed last night, I absolutely stuffed my face, even though I had just eaten a fantastic dinner of chicken with mushrooms over pasta.  Boy, oh boy, luckily I was so beat that I passed out on the couch before I could eat myself into a stupor.

4.  I started watching another kindergartner, A, after school.  He was on L's teeball team, and his mom was having a difficult time finding child care that would be able to pick him up from school, so I offered to watch him until she gets home.  Let's just say that you can never know just how a child behaves indoors by only seeing him outdoors. The first thing A does when we walk in the door is ask to eat.  I'm not even sure if he has a volume button.  So, naturally I'm thinking, "what did I get myself into to?!"  Now, don't get me wrong, he is a good kid, but he'll just need to breaking to get him to understand the rules in the W house, if he doesn't eat me out of house and home first!

5. L's second day of school didn't begin as well as his first.  Unfortunately, the school has a special first day drop off, but on the second day, the kindergartners have to start using the correct door and go in alone.  I guess it was a bit overwhelming.  P has decided to drop him off in the mornings, and when he let him out of the car, apparently my little man got all teary eyed and said that he didn't know where to go. I just feel so bad for him.  Obviously, he was quite intimidated.  In the end though, he managed to overcome his fears and have a "perfect" day.  He told me that he's trying to become the "Star Student," he's already earned 2 green checks, so he's certain that he's going to be it.  My fingers are crossed for him.  I have no doubt that he is a star student, whether or not he is deemed to be THE one.

6. Tonight, when she was going to bed, my big J was crying because she misses her friends from her old preschool.  Just broke my heart.  I have promised play dates, and that seems to have brightened her day.  I hope I can deliver.

7. The other day, my friend Devan posted this as his facebook status: A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd...think about it.  Profound.  Just something to think about.


8.  Today, my father shared with me a heartbreaking story about a fellow small business owner who just recently lost his 16 year old son to cancer.  When he took his son to the hospital to get treatment, the doctor said in ear shot of his son, "there's nothing we can do here.  You need to take him to hospice."  The boy started to scream and cry that he wasn't ready to die yet.  As his father was wheeling him down the hall, the boy started to scream, "no! help me!" and then immediately died.  As my father was tell me this story, both of our eyes were welling up.  Apparently, his wife died 10 years ago and he took his son to AZ for an experimental treatment, depleting his savings.  My heart aches for this man and for his deceased family. But, it aches for my father too.  I know how painful it is to hear of the loss of another service member. I can only imagine how it must have hurt him to listen to another father's pain, especially hearing every gruesome detail. 

As I prepare to hit the hay this evening, it makes me think about my son, L, who will embark on a brand new adventure tomorrow...kindergarten.  I got to thinking about how I'd sometimes love to escape back to a world that was so much easier.  Nothing really difficult to worry about, just go to school, play, and go home.  But then, it dawned on me as I thought back to L's bedtime kisses tonight.  He was so ultra excited to start school tomorrow, and if I know my boy, and I do, he is also really scared about starting a new school.  Then, it dawns on me...we are able to deal with all we do on a daily basis because we have been dealing with stuff like that our whole lives.  Sure, to me in my 30's, childhood looks so easy, but I bet to a child, these small things are huge monumental stressors too.  And here, I am thinking its so easy to be a kid.  Maybe its not.  Just some food for thought.

And on that note, I'd like to add that I have packed my very first lunch for my big boy: an all natural (just peanuts and salt) peanut butter and low sugar strawberry jelly sandwich on 100% whole grain bread, an apple, an organic carrot sliced into spears, and some crackers with laughing cow cheese (L's favorite) to spread on there, all along with an aluminum bottle of water.  Wow!  Right now, I'm feeling pretty darn impressed with my healthy lunch.  I wonder how long that will last.  I mean, will he get bored of healthy food?  Will it just be so much easier to buy junk and send it with him?  Will he be teased because he doesn't have any fruit snacks, chips or cookies like he was in preschool?  I don't know.  I sure hope not.  I hope that I can provide healthy options for him so that he'll grow up loving healthy food and not have to deal with the struggles I have everyday; namely, wanting to eat crap all day long and getting fat as a result.  Yes, my friends, I love JUNK FOOD!  Especially the sweet stuff.  Nom nom nom.

I'm trying to buy more organic foods, where it makes sense, is readily available, and (and here is the key) where it doesn't cost us an arm and a leg.  Today, I was able to find organic milk at WalMart for a reasonable price, bought some organic carrots, yogurt, and eggs.  This week, I hope to make it to my local farmer's market to purchase some organic locally grown veggies that I can freeze for the upcoming months.  We'll see how this goes, but I'm hoping it will be successful.  Just a little nervous about taking the 3 girls out without my big helper, though this may give J the opportunity to step up and act like a more mature 4 year old.  Or, should I just say, less lazy since she always relies on L to do everything for her.

I think this school year is going to be an interesting one in the W household, but I'm ready to take on the challenges...or at least I am going to give it my best try, barring any mental breakdowns.  Back to school means taking on new challenges, making new friends, getting back into the swing of things, losing this baby weight, eating healthier, and changing our mind sets.  There is nothing we can't do, as long as we have a positive outlook and we give it our all!  Now, to remember that tomorrow morning when I've got to get 4 kids out of the door, all before 8:30. HA!

Kindergarten Orientation -- The Best Friends Ever

P and I took L for his Kindergarten orientation on Friday morning.  Wow!  It was quite the experience.  I think he will truly love and thrive at school.  But, what will the motivation be?  Learning to read?  No, it's going to be this little paper treasure chest that the teacher has put incentives in to reward the kids for good behavior.  If he earns 5 green checks, he will get to pick something from the box.  This is the only thing our son mentioned about the day and the only thing that really seemed to excite him.
As a mom, I was impressed by the sheer amount the students would be taught in their first year of school.  I was happy to see that L knows 2 boys in his class, though barely, he still knows their names and feels comfortable around them.  I was surprised to see that though we spend most of our time outside the world that is our local borough, I recognized or knew many of the other parents and kindergarten students, though most were in the other classes.  I did finally feel like we might just fit in in this small town.

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To say that life has thrown me a few curves balls lately would be an understatement.  For instance, the YMCA has been part of our lives for the last 2 years.  My children feel extremely comfortable there and so do I.  It is where and how we met and connect with most of our friends.  We have been truly blessed to have felt a true sense of community there.  Unfortunately, with the welcoming of our most precious little Q, we have now become unwelcome at the Y, at least for the next 4 to 7 months.  I will not get into it, but you can imagine it was quite a surprise for me.  With all of the stress I have been working through, this truly was the straw, the one that just broke me.  But, what do the best friends in the world do?  They pick you up when you are down and help you stand back up, on your own 2 feet.

After kindergarten orientation, I had some things I had to do, but then I met up with 3 of my girlfriends at the park.  I brought the birthday cake that P and the kids made me the day before to share, or really, to get rid of it so that I didn't eat the whole thing by myself.  Yes, I would.  Scary.  

When I arrived, everyone met at the picnic table and started passing around party hats for the kids.  My immediate thought was, "Crap!  Its one of the kids' birthdays and I didn't bring a gift.  How could I have failed to have known this?!"  Luckily, it wasn't anyone's birthday, it was mine!  I was so incredibly touched.  They had brought stuff for sandwiches, fresh veggies, fruit and brownies.  Yum!  They even gave me gifts: workout clothes, a buff moms dvd, candle, and stuff to manage my disgusting feet.  Boy, do they know me well.  

The kids had so much fun playing with their friends and so did I.  

My friends are the best because they make me realize that life is good when there are people out there that love you, not because they have to, but because they want to.  Thanks, ladies!

Happy 33rd Birthday to Me!

Wow!  Has it been forever since I've recorded my thoughts on here, but I've just been so busy enjoying being a mommy to a newborn again.  Our little Q has been such a blessing and I truly can't imagine life without her, I mean, its like she's always been here.  Seriously, she's just perfect and the kids absolutely love her.  What more can a mom want?!

Well, believe it or not, for my birthday, I came up with a list of things I wanted:
1. No crying, whining, or fighting
2. For my husband to treat me like I am the only woman in the world
3. Some time ALONE

Here's what I got:
1. From P: Chocolate covered strawberries, truffles, a mother's ring (well, in 2 weeks I'll have it), and a fantastic dinner at AuRants (phyllo wrapped lamb pops with elderberry sauce and an ostrich fillet with rainbow swiss chard)
2. From L: a shell from the beach that he colored on
3. From my friends: video messages, texts, voicemails and facebook messages.  I even found out that my girlfriend is 18 weeks along-amazing gift!
4. From P, L and J: butter pecan cupcakes and a strawberry cake
5. My van was finally ready and I got it back!
6. My roofer friend came over and covered the plywood that was exposed on our roof due to Hurricane Irene.  He also replace a few shingles where the tar paper stayed on the roof.  We are still waiting for the adjuster, but at least we shouldn't get wet when it rains this weekend.
7. P was barely on his phone or computer all day long.  That's right.  It was awesome!
8. I got to workout with my husband.  That never happens.  Loved it!
9. I got to have a hydromassage at the gym while I fed my Q.  Relaxing and tender moment.  Darn did it feel good!
10. I signed my J up for preschool that starts next Wednesday.  Yes, it took quite a while to get this sorted out, but today I came to terms that we are moving on from the YMCA and onto another chapter of our lives.  I even found out that she now knows at least 3 kids in her class.  I know she'll feel so much more comfortable now, at her new school.  That just makes me feel so much more at ease.  This program is more academic and I'll be supplementing it with swim lessons at the Pittston Y, so this should be a complete win.
11. I got 50 whole minutes ALONE!  Yep, that's right!  ALONE!  Granted, I was registering Jaimee at school and swapping the loaner for my van, but there were NO KIDS with me at all, not even Q.  Now, I LOVE my kids more than anything in the world, but let me tell you how extraordinary it feels not to have to make sure that your children aren't running into the road, and not having to listen to them cry, whine, or fight.  Pure bliss!
12. Tons of love from my family and friends!!!  This was the best of all.  C put lip gloss on me and then came back and touched it up by her fingers.  It was so sweet.  All of the hugs and kisses and singing were just awesome.

All and all, this was an awesome birthday!  So much better than 2011 has been lately.

Miss you, Den!  Happy Birthday to my brother, D